Sunday, November 15, 2009

It's working!


WE HAVE PROGRESS ALREADY!! After two days of doing the peroxide we notice the very top scar which was stuck in short hair is already off! This was the confidence booster I needed, possibly Ellie also, that this will work and it will be ok. It turns out the peroxide and scrubbing/washing head hasn't been traumatizing like I thought it would be. Ellie sits hesitantly and Ryan has a special touch and talk with Ellie. She lets him do it with very little fuss. She says she doesn't want Dr. Menezes to have to take them off at her next appointment. I don't blame her. This is one time she fully understands what we explained to her and she's cooperating without coaxing. I also don't want to have to do it down there. Going to so many appointments already wears on you and then having the anxiety of that on top would not be good for anyone. It's nice. I think this is all a part of the progress she is making by meeting with Ms. Struck, the school counselor, to talk about her feelings toward all this. I'm thankful for everyone helping us through this. Thanks to those supporting me personally now that I find myself dealing with it emotionally. It's much appreciated. Love you all!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

X-ray update


So early the next week after we went for the MRI I received a call from Dr. Menezes's office saying he wanted to see us Friday. I was leaving town for the weekend so we rescheduled for this past Wednesday. I had the day off for Veteran's Day so we took that advantage and went to Iowa City. He wanted an X-ray of Ellie's head to check on things. He also wanted to see us because she has spots on her scar that aren't healing. So we got there and they gave her some medicine to help her relax some so they could look at her head. While she was struggling a little with taking the medication she asked if they were going to go inside her head. I guess she wanted to make sure they weren't going to open her head up again. So I of course reassured her they weren't, that they were just going to look. She was cooperative but she had to be the one that moved her hair out of the way and no one could touch it. So we had a good day, not forcing her to do anything. The docs were able to see her scabs and told us what to do to help them come off. We have to put hydrogen peroxide on them and try to soak them with a wash cloth and peroxide, then when shampooing her hair try to scrub them so they come off. They asked us to come back in 3 weeks so Dec. 4th we have another appointment to check on the scabs. I have a feeling if they aren't off they will be scrubbing them to try to get them off down there. Oh the anxiety of what will happen in three weeks if we can't get them off, and the anxiety of trying to do this every night with Ellie.

Last night, our first night of doing this procedure, it was so sad. She was upset and said, "mommy I wish you could have the scar". This is heartbreaking. I told her I wish I could have the scar too. I wish I could take it all away from her and have to deal with it myself. So now we must continue on, every night trying to soak her scabs and scrub them off. Something good though is that I have noticed since Ellie has been meeting with the guidance counselor at school once a week to talk about everything that has happened to her, Ellie has been able to talk to me more about her feelings and tell what specifically she is afraid of. So this is very helpful. I'm hopeful this will continue and we can work through all of her fears.